Claudia’s Blog

This is Veronica. She is the bride and she is 25 years old. She finished her high school and she went to beauty school, in both cases, with the parish’s support. She has a 2 year old son from a previous boyfriend (father Luis Carlos told me that). Even though she told me that her son’s father was the man she was going to marry, they have only been together for 2 years (at this point I’m not sure). Veronica is currently pregnant with her soon-to-be husband’s child.

Veronica and her husband are modern Samburu. He is an army soldier who comes home every three months. Veronica has her own beauty business. They rent a small bedroom in town. Her plans are to have a small family, just 3 children in total. She mentioned that she would like to have girls because they take care of the mom, while the men do not take care of their mothers (this perception has really changed). Remember, in Samburu culture men are very important. They are the family’s legacy. In a family that has boys, the boys are guaranteed to take care of their parents when they get old. But, lately families have seen daughters as taking care of the parents more that men, so this perception has been changing little by little. This is very important for women. If the society sees them as valuable, they are going to take more care of their women!!!

Veronica met her husband while she was young, and she is in love. This is a big difference between and educated women and one who isn’t. The educated woman can choose her husband, while the uneducated woman is married off to the man the parents choose. Also, the uneducated woman gets married at a much younger age.

One of the problems for the Samburu women are the mother in law. Veronica is lucky because her mother in law likes her. However, some women have told me that they have decided not to get married with a man because the man’s mother does not like them. My idea of this problem is as this culture is focus in men power. The power of a family is in the man: the father or the oldest son. So, when the oldest son gets married and leaves to make his own family, the mother feels unprotected and fights for her son!!

Nelly, the lady who took me to the wedding (you will hear about the wedding in another post), is a hard worker. She has a shop in town in which she sells oil, cookies, candies but the main product is miraa. These are leaves that when you chew it produce the effects as an hallucinogen (I tried it but didn’t produce anything in me, maybe I didn’t have enough). You should eat it with peanuts, I have no idea why.

Anyway, Nelly has 4 daughters. She is a widow. In Samburu tradition, if your husband dies you stay a  widow for the rest of life. It doesn’t mean you can’t have a boyfriend, it just means that you can’t get married again. Nelly had her first daughter with her husband. Later he died in an accident and she had a new boyfriend and two more daughters. After, she had another boyfriend and another daughter. The fathers of her daughters help her once in a while with some food but not with school fees or other things. Nelly has to support her daughters by herself. Also, because she can’t get married, the men have all left. To the question of why she had 4 children if she doesn’t have any support from the fathers her answer was “I was looking for a boy” …Really?? if you think this is a special answer, look at this: Nelly has not told any of her daughters who their fathers are. She told me that they might leave looking for their fathers and she would be left alone!!!  So, everyone lives the consequences of their own decisions!!!

In this culture having boys is a blessing… instead girls are not very welcome. It is weird for me, because when your daughter gets married you as a parent receive animals and in some cases money. But in this patriarchal culture being a man is important. A man is the one who receives the inheritance in case the father dies. Also, what the single and widowed women have told me is that when you have a boy in the family people don’t gossip as much as when you just have girls. Now, I can understand Nelly and why she wished to have a boy.

Nelly wore her traditional Samburu necklace for the wedding

Nelly danced at the wedding!!

Today is my first day in Lodonguoke. My night was ok. At the beginning I couldn’t sleep well because the bathroom has a window but not glass so and I was afraid an animal would get in even if I closed the bathroom door. But, later, I was too tired and fell asleep.

In the morning I went with Serge, a priest from the Ivory Coast and Jeen, one of Lodonguoke leaders to Lolua. Lolua is a small community 1 hour away on foot from Lodonguoke. Yes!! Walking on a hot day and it isn’t an easy road (picture). This is a dessert: the soil is red and it has a lot of up and downs. (picture). For me, it wasn’t an easy walk. Most of the time Serge and Jeen walked ahead so they had to wait for me. Of course, they have more practice. A few times I had to ask for some help getting down small hills.  After this long journey, we finally arrived to Lolua. We had to wait because the women were bringing some water. While waiting, I took Ntua (the puppet) and I played with the children. 

Finally, the 6 women arrived and father Serge celebrate the mass (see video women singing). The topic of the service today was a question: “what happens after we die?” The service was very interactive. The women spoke about the various traditions of burying the dead in the Samburu culture. A man who is married and has children is buried in the lot where the rest of the family lives. In the past, a man who died single was thrown out to the hyenas. But, now his family buries him outside of were they live. For the Samburu, a man who doesn’t have family is not going to be remembered by anybody.

Anyway, going back to the main topic of the service. What happens after death? The women answered that people go back to Nkai (God). The priest emphasized more about the legacy. He invited them to always do the best in all the situations, so they can be remembered for the good actions they did in life. He also reminded them that we can’t bring our possessions with us when we died. This is very important message, because some Samburu men care so much about their animals that even if they or their families have a medical emergency, sometimes they don’t want to sell an animal to pay for medical services. And a family will almost never sell an animal to pay for the education fees of their children. I hope this message stays in their minds. The problem is that there was only one man at the mass. I’m seeing that men are not likely to participate in the services… I hope they can receive the message through the women!! 

After mass I had the opportunity to introduce myself. In my introduction I always tell the group than I am a woman like them, that I have been married for 25 years in a monogamous relationship. I have two children Juan and Valentina. And I have overcome some difficulties and problems like them. I invited them to the workshop I’m going to have next week.

Today was a travel day. We woke up in Barsaloi very early in the morning. We left town at 6:20am to Maralal. The trip was 2 hours. Even though it has been raining, the rivers were ok and we were able to cross without any problem.

We arrived at Maralal around 9am. We stopped at the mechanic because there was something wrong with the car’s back door. We also went to the bishop offices (picture). The bishop is the bishop for Maralal and the surrounding region. He is from Italy. The Italian priests were the first one to come to evangelize.

This is the dioceses of Maralal

We left from Maralal around 11:30. Lodonguoke, is the new city I’m going to stay 2 weeks. It is not to far from Maralal but the road is really bad (pictures). So, we took around 2 hours to get there.

Lodonguoke is the mission of Father Carlos from Colombia and Serge from Ivory Coast. There is also a seminarist, Sergio from Colombia, here too. Father Carlos is the superior here. He has been a priest for 38 years, and he has served in Africa for 20 years!!! He speaks a perfect Swahili. He loves his community and helps them and supports them, just like a good father with his children!!!

Today I had a workshop with the women of Tuum. Unfortunately, this is the only workshop I am going to have here :(. In the afternoon we are leaving to Barsaloi to sleep there and tomorrow early in the morning I’m going with Father Carlos and Sergio (a seminarist) to Lodonguoke. 

At the workshop, there were around 15 women. They enjoyed and participated in all the activities. It was curious that when I showed them the various scenes representing the different kinds of violence they face, the women were asking me “how I knew their problems very well” 

Tuum, like other towns in the area, has various problems with violence against women. However, the situation here is a little different than in Barsaloi. In Barsaloi, the women feel supported because they have a woman chief. Instead in Tuum, the women said that the chief doesn’t care about their problems because he is a man. This is a very dangerous situation that I hope changes in the future.

Another big problem in Tuum is the high rates of alcoholism. This is the first time that I have had a women smelling of alcohol. However, she was not drunk and she even participated, contributing with important point of views!!!

After the workshop, the comments to the regional superior were that they enjoyed the activities and learned new things!! So, even if I would have liked more time here, at least the women had the opportunity to reflect on their problems and their possible solutions.

I am in Tuum. This is a small city two and a half hours away from Barsaloi. We are here (meaning the priests and I) because they are going to inaugurate the new parish’s house of Tuum. The bishop is the most important guest. 

The celebrations started with a mass. The church was full of people. There was even some Turkana, a rival tribe of the Samburu. Part of the town of Tuum is a “border” between the Samburu and the Turkana, and the parish here work with both tribes. Today, all of them are enjoying the new house with a mass and lunch.

The mass was celebrated by the bishop. The music was very nice. The women wear their best clothes. And today, because of the celebration, there were a lot of men too. The lunch was traditional food: goat, beans, rice and chapati (tortillas). I tried the goat, but I didn’t like it. 

After the mass the priest and the bishop blessed the new house. The group of elders also blessed the house with some leaves and milk. The difference between one and the other was that the Catholic priest blessed the house, and the elders used sacred milk!! Another difference was that in the Catholic way they blessed one time. Instead the group of elders went around three times blessing the house (video).

Anyway, it was a very nice celebration. Later in the evening we had dinner (the sisters, priests and I). Father Jairo congratulated Yadira, the main priest of the Tuum congregation, for making the new house a reality. Father Jairo said “I congratulate you for this house and for not waiting for the perfect time”. I identified with this, because I think sometimes we wait for the perfect time and we postpone actions and decisions for a moment that never comes. The perfect time is now!!!